Lily Evans and the Golden Lyre
by capella.black
Summary: At the start of Lily’s sixth year, something is stolen from Hogwarts–a powerful magical object, one Lord Voldemort would want. Can Lily unravel the object’s mysterious past and discover the thief’s identity in time to ‘once defy’ the Dark Lord?
1. A Bad Hair Day

Disclaimer: Most of these characters and places belong to J.K. Rowling. I'm only borrowing them for a little fun. Please don't sue me.

A/N--Although this is mainly a story about Lily's sixth year, some things needed to be set up at the end of fifth year. We begin a few weeks before the O.W.L.s and in the middle of a dream.

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**Chapter One: A Bad Hair Day**

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_It looks like Evans has seen the Snitch!_

_Have I? Yes, there it is. Shouldn't I be going after it? Yes, Minister, I know nobody ever beat Lord Voldemort at Quidditch before, but an Order of Merlin, Second Class? Really, it's too much. No, I don't fancy taking over your job either, sir. I have a lot on my plate just now, what with the O.W.L.'s starting tomorrow. They started today? Oh bloody hell._

_What? Oh sorry Melinda! I forgot the match wasn't over. Yes, the Snitch, the Snitch. I need to find it before the Death Eaters do, or the Sorting Hat will be cross with me again._

_Now why is Pettigrew wearing the Sorting Hat? It doesn't really suit him._

_Stop yelling, Melinda, I am focusing on the game, thank you very much. _

_The stands are hissing and everyone's gone. How could they leave me alone with Voldemort? He's just sitting there, snacking on snakes like he hasn't a care in the world. Rude, if you ask me. Wait, I shouldn't have said that, now he's coming for me. A laugh to freeze the blood in your veins. But he doesn't want the Snitch, he's after Athena. You can't have her, she's my owl! What do you want her for anyway?_

_I get it. I've been looking in a mirror all this time. That makes perfect sense. There I am, eyes flashing red. No, wrong. Eyes clear blue, like the lake. Hm, wrong again. Emerald green, that's more like it. But now it's Potter's reflection. Get out of my dream, you stupid prat! I said in your dreams, not mine._

_A bolt of green lightening streaking the sky and Potter's falling, broom and all, down, down down, into the endless abyss. I am guarding the goalposts, Melinda, but in case you didn't notice, I could get expelled for this. I could get expelled and all you think about is breakfast?_

Lily turned in her bed, keeping her eyes squeezed shut, trying to cling to some shred of the dream she had been having only seconds before. It was too late; she was awake. Feeling rather disappointed, she groped about for her wand, found it, and opened the curtains of her four-poster bed. Melinda Marchbanks stood by the door, about to head down to breakfast.

"Finally, you're up," said Melinda, pausing for moment. "It only took me four hundred tries to wake you. Abigail and Serena already went down."

"Sorry. I was having an interesting dream… think I was playing in the Quidditch World Cup."

Melinda replied by snorting with laughter. Lily couldn't blame her; Melinda played Keeper for Gryffindor and was very good at it. Meanwhile she, Lily, got knocked off her broom by the very sight of a Quaffle, as they had both discovered last summer. She could fly well enough, just not when heavy things were being thrown at her.

"Do you want me to wait while you get ready?" Melinda asked once she'd regained her composure.

"No, go ahead, I'll be down soon," said Lily.

She struggled to remember some other--any other--part of the dream, as Melinda turned and left, but it was no use. Like so many dreams before it, this one had sunk seamlessly back into the subconscious from whence it came.

------

Gray clouds were hanging heavily over the Great Hall when Lily finally arrived. She spotted Melinda and Serena midway down the Gryffindor table and joined them.

"Why are you looking like I just insulted your favorite auntie?" Melinda was asking.

"Because," Serena pouted, "you know you're supposed to be suffering by my side in the library, and you went ahead and got detention anyway!"

"What'd you get detention for?" Lily asked, helping herself to some eggs and toast.

"Accidentally walloping Slytherin's captain in the head with my broom," Melinda replied casually. "Anyway," she said, turning back to Serena, "you've got Lily to suffer with."

"Actually, no," Lily said. "Well, not for long. I've got a prefects' meeting tonight."

"That's odd. How come?" Serena asked.

"Don't know, they didn't say. But you'll still have Abigail," Lily pointed out, now looking around the table. "Where is Abigail?"

"I saw her talking to some girls at the Hufflepuff table a few minutes ago," said Melinda. "I suspect Clementine Harper and Eustace Womple have split up again."

"We'll know soon enough," Serena sighed. Abigail had a habit of bringing in scraps of useless gossip, rather like Lily's cat at home brought in mangled rodents in hopes of praise. But when Abigail returned, she was looking a touch more upset than the break-up of Clementine Harper and Eustace Womple would have warranted.

"What's wrong?" Lily asked, taking another piece of toast. Abigail didn't answer; Lily looked up and saw tears in her eyes.

"It's Audrey Davis," she finally said, with a shuddery breath. Lily had a sinking feeling that she already knew what this was about. It would be the fifth time that year some student had gotten horrible news involving their family and Lord Voldemort's Death Eaters. She braced herself as Abigail continued.

"They tortured her parents, in front of her little sister. Some time last night. Her dad's in St. Mungo's now and her sister hasn't spoken a word since it happened."

They sat in gloomy silence, pondering this latest atrocity. Lily didn't know Audrey too well since she was the year below them. She tried to push from her mind the image of a little girl watching her mum and dad on the floor, screaming in agony while dark hooded figures laughed mercilessly. She set down her piece of toast, not so hungry anymore, and was silently thankful that her family were all Muggles. Muggles who would never cross the path of Lord Voldemort.

Looking around the table again, determined to think of something less depressing, Lily's eyes fell on the boys from her year, huddled and whispering excitedly. They had been acting like that for the last couple days and it made her uneasy. Any day that Lily did not have to deal with that particular band of thugs was a good day in her book, but their recent behavior had to be the calm before the storm. She only hoped that whatever havoc they were about to wreak would be wreaked far from her.

------

They had Potions that afternoon. It served as a good enough distraction from the woes of the world, if only for an hour. Lily's potion already looked better than all the others at her table, and she was happily adding extra dried billywig stings in an attempt to turn it a deeper shade of scarlet.

At the table in front of her, Sirius Black was evidently content with the bright red hue of his potion. He was sitting by his cauldron and giving the Slytherin side of the room an appraising look.

Professor Slughorn waddled over to the girls' station.

"Lily, Lily!" he greeted, taking a cursory glance at her work and giving the usual nod of approval. He might have taken more time to admire her ingenuity, but today he was looking rather excited about something else. "I'm having an end-of-term get together, you know, the usual crowd," he explained jovially. "Can I count on the honor of your presence?"

"Thank you, Professor, I would love to," she replied. That wasn't strictly true. Lily had always felt a bit uncomfortable with Slughorn's unabashed favoritism among his students. She had tried, for years, to politely explain this to him. He usually accused her of being too modest or too clever, and showed no signs of having understood her point. Yet he seemed so fond of her--so impressed by what he called her "natural aptitude for potions"--that she couldn't bring herself to boycott the many exclusive social events he hosted. She had finally resolved to leave the matter alone, for fear of sounding like a broken record, and enjoy the Slug Club's membership perks. Anyway, she could always goad him about his heartily denied pure blood biases instead.

Slughorn turned to ask Abigail the same question; her parents and several uncles had high-ranking jobs at the Ministry of Magic.

Lily was trying to decide if her potion was scarlet enough when all hell broke loose at the Slytherin tables. She looked up to see an oddly shaped black bird attacking two of the girls, who were screeching and trying to hide behind their cauldrons. Then she noticed Severus Snape standing next to them, completely bald, and realized that the strange bird was, in fact, his hair.

Lily burst out laughing. She couldn't help it. The sight of Snape's bald, chalk white head was too comical, and his twisted expression wasn't helping matters any. He stood transfixed, watching his greasy black tresses whip around the table.

The Gryffindor side of the room was roaring with laughter. Remus Lupin was doubled up, Peter Pettigrew was gasping for breath, and James Potter had tears rolling down his face. Serena was gripping the table for support, Melinda was clutching at the stitch in her side, and Abigail's face now matched Lily's potion. Sirius had actually sunk to his knees and was pounding the floor with his fist between howls. A few of the Slytherins had hastily retreated from the action and were laughing now too, in spite of themselves.

The hair chased the girls purposefully around their table. One of them swatted wildly at it with her wand, managing to knock it into a cauldron at last. It floated for a moment and then sank with a loud burble. The potion immediately turned a funny shade of brown.

Slughorn, his face looking like a dam about to burst, hurried over to the cauldron and waved his wand. The potion disappeared and he levitated the now lifeless tangle of hair back to its owner. Snape continued to gape at it for a few seconds before reaching out to take it.

The Gryffindors were having collective hysterics. Snape, tightly clutching his hair, looked positively murderous as Slughorn steered him out of the room and pointed him toward Madam Pomfrey. Lily noticed Slughorn was biting his lip very hard.

"It was Black and Potter, Professor!" Snape shrieked in the corridor. If Slughorn gave an answer, it was too soft to be heard over the din inside. The Potions master did not return for several minutes after Snape's continued howls of "Black" and "Potter" had faded away.

He had rearranged his face into the sternest expression possible when he finally strode back into the classroom. With his enormous belly sticking out even more than usual, he surveyed the remaining students. They were all--every last one of them--flushed and panting like they had run a very intense race.

Slughorn's eyes narrowed in the direction of James and Sirius, but he seemed to decide that he could not interrogate them while keeping a straight face, and dismissed the class.

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Feedback makes my day!


	2. Dumbledore's Concerns

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**Chapter Two: Dumbledore's Concerns**

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News of the Snape hair incident traveled swiftly, as news at Hogwarts always did. Lily overheard Pettigrew telling a group of rapt sixth years in the common room before dinner. In his version the hair chased Snivellus around the room and the cauldron exploded violently. Much to Lily's annoyance, the sixth years actually went up to congratulate Black and Potter.

Black and Potter, for their part, had been ensconced in the best armchairs by the fireplace all evening, receiving the admirations of a steady stream of Gryffindors. Most of these were younger students though--boys who looked up to them and girls with puppy crushes. Their heroes were trying to play it cool, but privately Lily thought she had never seen two people looking quite so pleased with themselves.

She tried to ignore them and immerse herself in her Muggle mystery novel, but her conscience squirmed uncomfortably. For one thing, she felt guilty for laughing at someone else's misery. Snape may have been odd--and, yes, slightly creepy--but he didn't deserve the treatment he routinely got at the hands of her housemates. And, what was worse, her laughing had almost certainly fueled their raging egos. Especially Potter's.

"Hey, Evans!" She winced and looked up. Potter was twisted around in his chair, shooting her what he must have thought was a winning smile. "Care to join us for a butterbeer?"

"No, thank you," she said, standing up and closing her book irritably. Black raised an amused eyebrow.

"What's eating you?" he asked. For some reason, a pair of third year girls behind him found this extremely funny.

"I don't see why you two always have to be so mean to him."

"Who, Snivelly?" Potter looked confused. Lily just glowered at him.

"Mean?" Black asked in a tone of mock innocence. "We were only trying to help him. With hair that foul, I'd say baldness is a huge improvement. He ought to be grateful."

The rest of the kids laughed appreciatively, but Lily collected her things and stalked out of the room without looking back.

------

Several hours later, Lily scanned the steadily filling Charms classroom and spotted Remus Lupin near the back. He caught her eye and beckoned her to join him. It was strange, she thought as she made her way over, to see this room at night, with the rain lashing against the windows and the darkness pressing in.

"Saved you a seat," he said with a little smile, pulling it away from the table with his toe so she could sit. The two of them had, to some extent, become friends this year, thanks to their shared prefect duties. While Lily had not entirely forgiven him for the company he kept, she had at least come to appreciate that he didn't share their penchant for wanton cruelty. Mischief, yes, but not cruelty. She supposed this was why he had been made prefect. Unfortunately for her, he was either unable or unwilling to stand up to his friends. They had finally reached an unspoken agreement that she would handle telling off Black and Potter whenever possible, and he would see to most of the younger students. It helped to balance things out a bit, but Lily was still sure she had the raw end of that deal.

Lupin was looking rather pale and haggard tonight. This was unsurprising; he was one of the sickliest kids Lily had ever known. Nonetheless, she eyed him with concern.

"You look awful." He rolled his eyes.

"Lovely to see you too."

"No really, are you feeling alright?" she pressed.

"Quite," he said simply. Then, responding to her skeptical look, added, "Just tired from studying for the O.W.L.s, I suppose." He was saved from having to say anything more by the Hufflepuff girl who had just sat down in front of them.

"Is it true what they're saying?" she asked, looking back at him excitedly. "About Snivelly's hair?"

"Depends on what you heard," he replied. "It didn't try to bite Slughorn's nose." Lily stared at him. "What? Some kid in the library was saying so just now. Refused to believe me when I said otherwise."

"Alright, boys and girls, your attention please!" Portia Plimm, Head Girl, was calling the meeting to order, and drawing several resentful glances in the process. Head Boy Marty Foster hovered in the background, looking vaguely apologetic.

"I suppose you're all wondering," she began, when the chatter had died down, "why we called this emergency meeting tonight. But before I get to that… I take it everyone is aware of the tragedy that befell one of our students last night?" It took Lily a moment to remember whom she was talking about. "I'm sorry to be the one to tell you this, but Miss Davis's father passed away in St. Mungo's this afternoon, of injuries sustained during an alleged altercation with Death Eaters." Her tone was somber, but she did not look at all sorry to be the one telling them this.

The general mood took a palpable dive as people absorbed the news. For a few moments the only sound in the room came from the rain pattering against the windowpanes and the distant rumble of thunder. At last, Portia heaved a dramatic sigh and got down to business.

"The Headmaster has asked us to inform you all of his plans to tighten security around the school." Lily and Lupin exchanged puzzled looks, as did most of the other students. "For the remainder of the term, all students are to return to their common rooms by ten o'clock. There will be one designated teacher on duty every night. Prefects will be patrolling the halls in pairs from eight to ten and all suspicious activity should be reported to the teacher on call."

A stream of complaints broke out at these words, with many people trying to talk at once.

"That's completely ridiculous!"

"What'd you mean, suspicious activity?"

"But a lot of us have O.W.L.s and N.E.W.T.s to study for!"

"Yeah, we're really busy."

"Please," said Marty Foster finally stepping forward, "one at a time." Hands shot up and he called on a Hufflepuff boy sitting in the front row.

"Did he say why we need this, uh, tightened security?"

Portia rushed to answer, sounding reluctant to share her spotlight.

"These are dangerous times and naturally parents are worried… I'm sure the Headmaster just wants to set their minds at ease." This explanation convinced no one.

"Worried about what?" asked a Ravenclaw boy sitting across the aisle from Lily. "Death Eaters lurking in corridors? Hiding behind suits of armor, chucking Dungbombs at kiddies out of their beds at half past ten? Unless…" he frowned thoughtfully, "you don't think they've recruited Peeves?"

Everyone laughed except for Portia Plimm, who was now looking thoroughly annoyed. She started to give a reply, but Lily didn't catch any of it because Lupin had just leaned in to tell her something.

"He might not be that far off, you know," he whispered.

"What?"

"We, er… we accidentally overheard Dumbledore talking to Flitwick and McGonagall a couple nights ago," Lupin explained, looking slightly guilty. "Sounded like he was worried about…" he looked around then mouthed the word Voldemort, "trying to recruit someone inside Hogwarts." Lily wondered if he was pulling her leg, but Lupin looked perfectly serious.

"Where… how… why…" she began, casting about for the right question. But at that moment she was interrupted by a loud cough and looked up to see all eyes in the room on her.

"Are we boring you?" Portia Plimm asked, giving Lily a very unpleasant look. She felt her face turning red and stammered an apology.

"That's alright," Marty Foster said quickly, glancing at his watch. "Anyway, Portia and I have made up timetables for patrol duty." He waved his wand and a piece of parchment appeared in front of each prefect. "Instructions are on the bottom for where and when to meet, and the names of the teachers on duty each night. Please have a look and let us know if something doesn't work for you. Otherwise, you're free to go."

Chairs scraped loudly against the floor as people got up and hurried from the room. Lily, however, stayed put, examining her timetable.

"Oh that's just great, isn't it? Looks like we're on tomorrow night," she said to Lupin, who didn't reply. She looked up to see him already halfway to the front of the room. The Ravenclaw boy across the aisle grinned at her and she felt her face getting hot again. He was actually quite good looking, which didn't help matters any.

She got up and made for the door. Lupin was standing at the front of the room, in line to talk to the Heads. Lily paused to wait for him, but he noticed and gestured for her to go on. She turned on her heel and marched back to Gryffindor Tower alone.

------

Lily spent much of the following day wondering if there was any merit to Dumbledore's suspicions that Voldemort was trying to recruit someone at Hogwarts. Assuming, of course, that Lupin was telling the truth and that he had correctly interpreted the Headmaster's words. She resolved to ask him more about it at the next opportunity, letting slide the matter of how they--she knew he hadn't been using the royal we--found themselves in the position to eavesdrop on such a sensitive conversation.

The opportunity, however, failed to present itself. Lily tried several times during the day to discretely get Lupin's attention, but he seemed unusually determined to avoid her eye. This obviously suggested there was more to his story that he didn't care to share. At least they had patrol duty that night, which would give her ample time to badger him for more information whether he liked it or not.

According to the bottom of their timetables, they were to meet in the entrance hall at ten to eight and divvy up the floors with the other pair of prefects. At five past, Lupin had still not shown. Lily apologized repeatedly to the Hufflepuffs and agreed to do the upper floors. They eventually set off, leaving her to tap her foot impatiently and stare at her watch. The sound of her shoes hitting the flagstone floor echoed dully in the open space.

_What do I do if he doesn't come?_ she wondered. _He can't be that intent on avoiding me…_

She felt a tap on her shoulder that made her jump. Whirling around, she found herself face to face with the cute Ravenclaw boy from across the aisle.

"A little jumpy tonight, aren't we?" he smirked.

"Don't do that!" she snapped, reddening slightly. She had no idea how she'd managed to embarrass herself in front of this boy thrice in the past twenty-four hours. She didn't even know his name.

"Roger Gray," he said, extending a hand and rectifying at least one of those problems.

"Lily Evans." She hesitated before shaking his hand, half expecting to get an electric shock in the process.

"I just got a note saying one of the blokes on duty couldn't make it tonight. Guess I'm here to fill in," said Roger Gray by way of explanation.

"Oh, right." Lily was disappointed that she wouldn't get to debrief Lupin. But not, she admitted to herself, too disappointed. "Did it say why not?" she asked as they started up the stairs.

"No, sorry."

"Probably detention," she mused. "Or maybe the hospital wing."

"Detention? Why, is he a big troublemaker?"

"Not him so much as his friends," Lily said fairly. "But he's no stranger to detention either."

"Why'd they make him prefect then?"

"He was the best of the lot in my year, I guess."

"Rough," said Roger sympathetically. They turned onto the fourth floor corridor and proceeded in silence. Lily wracked her brain for a subject for casual conversation, but she couldn't help being distracted by the issue she had meant to discuss with Lupin.

"Why do you think Dumbledore has us doing this whole 'increased security' thing?" she asked.

"You know, I was wondering the same thing myself after the meeting," Roger replied. "Maybe the Ministry pressured him into it?"

"But it's not like him to cave in to the Ministry… even on little things like this." Actually that was a reasonable explanation, but she was more interested in seeing what Roger thought of the recruitment idea. She wondered how to introduce it without sounding completely batty.

"Maybe he's just picking his battles?" Roger shrugged.

"What if there was a threat to the school though? From--" she debated whether to say Voldemort's name. It had become increasingly taboo over the past few years and, while she thought this was silly, she was reluctant to use it on new acquaintances. "From You-Know-Who and his crowd?"

"Don't be daft," Roger said laughingly. "What would You-Know-Who want at Hogwarts? Okay, I'll admit he might like to get in here and bump a few of us off--"

"Or at least use that as a threat to parents," she offered. Roger stopped laughing and appeared to consider the matter with academic interest.

"But the school is protected by lots of powerful enchantments, not to mention Dumbledore himself. I don't see how this prefect patrol nonsense would prevent Death Eaters from getting in if all that fails," he said.

"What if he wasn't trying to get someone in?" She hesitated, wondering how ridiculous the next bit would sound. "What if he wants to recruit someone who's already here?"

Roger looked at Lily, clearly trying to decide if she was serious. It was much the same look she'd given Lupin the night before.

"I know it's not likely," she said defensively. "But it's possible, isn't it?"

"Anything's possible. I'm sure You-Know-Who's mind works in mysterious ways." Roger had resumed his tone of academic interest. He seemed willing to entertain bizarre ideas, if only for the sake of debate. Lily liked this. It made him fun to talk to. "He'd have to get a teacher though. None of the students are powerful enough to kill people. Or to use any of the Unforgivables."

Lily had, of course, considered this problem too. She'd had a whole day to mull it over after all.

"Maybe he doesn't want people killed," she argued. Roger shot her a very skeptical look. "Well of course he does, that's not what I meant. Maybe he wants something else too."

"Like what?"

"I don't know," she admitted. "He could want someone to spy on Dumbledore? Or to sneak something into the castle… or out of it…"

"I suppose you're right, but it still sounds pretty farfetched to me. I'm sure there's a much more boring reason we're out here." Lily could hardly argue with that. "Not that I'm complaining really," Roger added. "Better than studying for exams."

"Are you taking the O.W.L.s too?" she asked. She realized as she said it that they'd never had any classes together, so this probably wasn't the case.

"No, I did them last year," he replied. "They're not so bad really… so long as you're disciplined about studying..." He trailed off and they climbed up to the fifth floor corridor in silence. Lily wasn't particularly interested in discussing the O.W.L.s; even though they were still three weeks away, they seemed to be consuming her whole life. It really was a relief to have this imposed study break. And she certainly couldn't complain about the company.

"Your friend," said Roger, breaking the silence, "the other Gryffindor prefect… he seems sort of familiar but I can't place him…"

"Oh. Maybe you just remember him from the other prefect meetings?" Lily suggested.

"Yeah, maybe, but there was something else too…" He had the air of a man searching the dim, dark recesses of his memory. Lily wasn't sure where he might have met Lupin before and, honestly, she wasn't that interested. But it would have been rude to point this out.

"You might have caught him causing mayhem and had to give him detention?" It was the just the next thing that came to mind, and she meant it half-jokingly, but the flash recognition on Roger's face told her she'd hit the nail on the head.

"I remember them," he muttered, looking now like he wished he hadn't. There was no need to ask who he meant by them. "I found them trying to kidnap the caretaker's cat last year."

"Oh no!" Lily gasped. "That's horrible! What were they going to do to her?" Several unpleasant possibilities flitted across her mind. "Actually, I don't think I want to know."

"I couldn't tell you even if you did," he said, shaking his head. "Got out of there as quick as possible. I've never seen Filch so angry before, and that's saying something, isn't it? Wouldn't be surprised at all if he really brought out the whips and thumbscrews that time."

Lily was feeling inexplicably ashamed for having been seen next to Lupin the previous night. Then it occurred to her that if Lupin was involved, it was unlikely to be something too awful. Somewhat braced by this thought, she mentally filed this item with the growing list of things she wanted to ask him. And then she ran into Roger's arm.

"Shhh!" he hissed. Lily froze, momentarily confused, until she heard a noise coming from the classroom on their right. The rest of the corridor was empty. "Hear that?" he whispered. She nodded and the two of them pulled out their wands in unison. Although she knew it was probably just Peeves, her heart was still beating very loudly in her ears.

Roger pushed open the door and Lily followed him through it. It took her a moment to make sense of the ghastly sight that met her eyes, and when she did, it made her stomach turn.

They had walked in on a slurping, grunting knot of limbs and tangled hair that, on closer inspection, proved to be a pair of snogging Slytherins.

The girl was the first to notice; she sprang back and glared at the intruders with her chin jutting out defiantly. Lily recognized her as fourth year and fellow Slug Club member Lacerta Coulter. Her thickset boyfriend, who must have been every bit as dim as he looked, scratched his head and slowly followed her gaze until he too spotted the unwelcome company.

"Hey!" he roared, clenching his fists. "What the hell d'you mean barging in here like--like..."

"Sorry, mate," said Roger, trying to suppress a grin. "You might want to hoof it back to your common room though, before we have to report you for suspicious activity." The boy stared back mulishly, in a way that suggested he was unimpressed with this threat but unable to put his sentiments into words.

"Let's go," said Lacerta loudly, grabbing his hand and pulling him towards the door. "I get sick if I spend too much time in a room with revolting little Mudbloods."

"Charming kids," said Roger, looking highly amused as he watched them go.

"Yes," Lily agreed. "Pity they had to leave." He held open the door, grinning impishly at her, and all of a sudden Lily felt very nervous.

"You think we actually have to report that though?" he said, turning off the lights and following her back into the empty corridor.

"Huh?"

"That suspicious activity." He jerked his head in the direction of the classroom.

"I don't know," said Lily, regaining her wits as they set off again. "I suppose if You-Know-Who did want to recruit Hogwarts students, they're just the sort who'd sign on. Especially that Coulter girl. I've heard her talking before, and it sounds like her family are big supporters."

"Yea, but why go through all the trouble just to set her snogging hairy apes in empty classrooms?"

"Well you're the one who said You-Know-Who's mind works in mysterious ways," Lily laughed. They lapsed into a companionable silence as a group of first years hurried past.

"Mudblood," said Roger a few minutes later. "Funny word, that."

"Beg your pardon?"

"It's meant to be this really insulting word for Muggle-borns, isn't it? But if you're Muggle-born, you never hear it until you get to school. I didn't even know I was supposed to be offended til someone explained it to me."

"Oh, so you're Muggle-born too?" Lily wasn't sure why she was so pleased to learn this.

"Well, my mum's a Muggle anyway," he shrugged. "I thought she was a witch when I was little, but that's before I knew witches really exist and are usually decent." He said it jokingly, but he couldn't mask the hint of underlying bitterness in his voice.

"So your dad's a wizard then?" she asked, confused.

"He might be. I wouldn't know, he left when I was only a few months old," he muttered darkly.

"Oh..." Lily found herself at a complete loss for words. She was sorry she asked, but that didn't strike her as quite the right thing to say. Roger looked over and caught her flustered expression.

"Sorry!" he said hastily. "Didn't mean to burden you with my family problems like that--"

"Oh no, it's--"

"I don't usually go telling people I've only just met." He sounded genuinely embarrassed.

"Why not? It's such a delightful story." Lily forced a little laugh, then mentally kicked herself for having the social graces of Lacerta Coulter's boyfriend. The silence that followed her words was not just awkward but positively oppressive.

"So," said Roger at last, in a resolutely bright voice, "you follow any Quidditch teams?"

••••••••••••

Feedback makes me really happy.


	3. Gray and Black

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**Chapter Three: Gray and Black**

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With the O.W.L.s practically at their doorstep, the fifth years were so deluged with homework that Lily hardly had time to eat or sleep for the next week. The workload had pushed all thoughts of Voldemort's schemes and Dumbledore's security measures from her mind. However it could not, to her mild annoyance, completely blot out thoughts of Roger Gray.

_It wasn't fair for him to spring that on me_, she thought, staring unfocusedly at her half-finished Arithmancy problems.

'But it shows he trusted you, felt comfortable around you,' a little voice in her head retorted.

_Well I certainly bungled that one, didn't I? He'll never want to talk to me again…_

"Aaauuuuggghhhh!" Lily looked up in time to see Melinda dropkick her Potions book at the wall. "What kind of sick, twisted git assigns an essay comparing and contrasting Confusing Concoctions and Befuddlement Draughts?" she fumed.

"Here, you can look at mine if you're stuck," Lily sighed, rolling off her bed and handing it over. The clock on her nightstand showed nearly three in the morning. Looking around at her bleary-eyed friends, Lily realized that what they all needed was a break. "I'm going to Hogsmeade tomorrow," she announced.

"Good for you," Serena mumbled without lifting her head from the desk.

"You're coming with me," she said firmly. "All of you. It's the last trip of term and if we don't relax for a few hours, we'll all burn out before exams even begin."

Saturday morning dawned muggy and gray. The skies were threatening rain as they tramped down to the village, but it was such a relief to be out of the castle that nobody seemed to care.

Lily spotted Remus Lupin inside Honeydukes as she was stocking up on sugar quills. Remembering that she had wanted to talk to him, she started to wend her way over, but stopped when she heard other voices nearby.

"Come on Moony, try it!"

"If you don't get that thing out of my face, I swear I'll--"

"But you're supposed to _like_ things like this!"

"Why don't you try it then?"

"Look, Prongsie's trying one!"

"Does it really taste like blood?"

"Mmm, it does, Wormtail, and it's delicious. You guys don't know what you're missing."

"That's disgusting…"

Lily decided she wasn't _that_ keen to talk to Lupin and hurried off to find her friends, feeling slightly queasy.

As they walked up and down the high street perusing the merchandise at various shops, Lily's mind kept straying back to a certain sixth year Ravenclaw prefect. When she then saw him, ambling towards them and whistling off key, she had to close her eyes for a moment to make sure she wasn't hallucinating. She opened them again and found him looking straight at her.

"Hey there, Evans," said Roger cheerfully. "Skiving off the O.W.L. reviews?"

"Guess so," she replied, trying to sound like she hadn't been thinking about him for the past half hour.

"Oh yeah," said Serena, walking over and sliding her arm through Lily's. "She's a terrible influence, Lily is. Dragged us all away from our studies." Roger tsk tsk'd in mock disapproval. "But," Serena continued, now addressing her friend, "I think we're ready to head back."

"Are you sure?" Lily asked, feeling disappointed. Now that Roger was here and talking to her, she was in no hurry to return to the school. "Wouldn't you rather stay and have a butterbeer? My treat…"

"Tempting, but no," Serena sighed. "I got a letter from mum and dad this morning. I don't think they'd ever let me come home if I fail my O.W.L.s."

"Well I'm not ready to go back yet," said Lily stubbornly. Then, shocked by her own daring, she turned to Roger. "How about you? Fancy a visit to the Three Broomsticks?"

Roger looked just as surprised by her invitation as she was. He hesitated and checked his watch. It only took him a few seconds to make up his mind, but to Lily it felt like an eternity.

"Sure, why not?" he shrugged.

Serena was looking at Lily with a level of interest that was entirely unnecessary. Then she too shrugged and said "suit yourself," before rejoining Abigail and Melinda.

"Sugar quill?" Lily held up her Honeydukes bag. As Roger was helping himself, she saw four boys emerge from Zonko's, thoroughly laden with stuff. She was suddenly aware that she'd been running her hand through her hair, and dropped it hastily.

Pettigrew was the first to notice her, but he had the good sense to tug on Potter's sleeve and point her out. Lily felt a slight, savage pleasure realizing that Potter wanted something he couldn't have--namely, her. She knew his parents spoiled him rotten; every week his owl brought sweets and expensive gifts from home, and he always had the best new racing broom the day it came out. But as James took in the sight of her with Roger, his face fell so completely that it knocked all such pleasure right out of her. She looked away quickly, trying not to feel guilty.

------

"How much?" she asked as Roger set two bottles of butterbeer on the table.

"What?"

"I said it was my treat."

"Nah, this one's on me." Lily opened her mouth to protest but then closed it again. If he wanted to be a gentleman, she saw no real reason to object. She took a sip of her drink and looked around idly, not seeing many familiar faces. Hagrid was sitting in a corner though. She waved at him and he waved back.

"Bet you can't wait til exams are over," Roger remarked conversationally.

"Of course," she said glumly. "It's not the studying I mind so much though, it's the stress."

"Yeah, your whole future hangs on this, doesn't it? Or at least that's what they keep telling you."

"How'd you do when you took them?"

"Well enough," he said indifferently. "I got all the N.E.W.T. classes I wanted."

"Which are…?"

"The important ones. Charms, Transfiguration, Defense, Potions, and Runes. Well, the Runes may not be that important, but I like them."

"What'd you want to be?" Lily asked.

"Minister for Magic," Roger replied calmly. "You?"

"Supreme Mugwump." He gave an appreciative chuckle while she took another swig of butterbeer. "So, got any exciting plans for the summer?"

"Not really, just working… same place I do every summer…"

"Which is…?" she pressed. Roger hesitated.

"Ice cream parlor," he said sheepishly. Lily tried and failed to stifle a giggle.

"At least you'll have something to fall back on if the Minister thing doesn't work out."

"Scooping ice cream professionally, there's an idea." Roger blew idly over the mouth of his bottle so that it sounded a deep note. "Then what're you planning to do for the summer, Little Miss Mugwump?"

"I don't know, just go home and spend time with my family I guess..."

"Oy, Roger!" They both looked up to see a tall, fair-haired boy waving at him from the back of the pub.

"Bertie, old boy!" Roger called back enthusiastically. "I was wondering where you'd got to." He jumped up out of his seat then looked back at Lily. "Say, nice talking to you again. Good luck with exams and everything."

"Oh, right," she said, trying to keep the disappointment out of her voice. "Yes, I'd better be getting back…"

"Cheers," said Roger, draining the last of his butterbeer and bounding off to join his friends. Lily gulped down the rest of her own drink and hurried out of the Three Broomsticks.

------

She was halfway back to the castle when it finally started raining. She pulled out her wand, conjured a green umbrella from the end of it, then resumed staring moodily at the dirt road ahead of her.

There was no real reason Roger's abrupt departure should have upset her so. She had thought they were having a good time, but it was perfectly reasonable for him to go off with his friends. It was just that his parting words had come out sounding so… final. And now, try as she might, she couldn't quite shake the image of his initial hesitation when she asked him to go for a drink.

"Hey, Evans!" She looked back and saw Sirius Black rushing to catch up with her. For most young witches at Hogwarts this would have been a welcome sight indeed--though one they were only likely to see in daydreams. Lily, however, had a fairly good idea why he was there, and she was really not in the mood to deal with him right then.

"What do you want, Black?" she said curtly as he drew level with her.

"You've been working on that McGonagall impression then, have you?" he replied, utterly unfazed. Glancing up at her umbrella, he pulled out his own wand and conjured an even larger one that overlapped hers. She tried taking a step away from him, but it just stretched to cover her. Sighing resignedly, she vanished her own umbrella and put her wand away.

"Well?"

"Well what? I just saw a lovely lady walking back to the castle alone and knew she would enjoy my company."

"Oh, ha ha," she muttered.

"Come on, you know you're powerless to resist my charms." He said this with such an eager puppy dog pout that Lily couldn't help softening a bit.

"Where're your mates?" she asked in a slightly gentler tone.

"Don't know," Sirius shrugged unconvincingly. "You have a good time in Hogsmeade?"

"Delightful."

"Yeah? What'd you do?" he asked, as though he were her best girl friend braiding her hair at a slumber party. She couldn't help marveling at how a boy who so often came across as the world's biggest git could suddenly be so sweet when he wanted something.

"Shopped," she said warily.

"That's it?" Lily didn't answer. "Who was that bloke you were walking into the Three Broomsticks with?" he asked, confirming her worst suspicions. "Do you fancy him?"

"No I do _not_ fancy him!" she snapped. "And tell Potter it's none of his sodding business who I walk into pubs with!" Sirius looked wholly unperturbed.

"Who said anything about James?" he asked innocently. "I only ask because, as a fellow Gryffindor, I feel honor bound to look out for your welfare. I'd hate to see you with some lowlife idiot who doesn't deserve you."

Lily sighed. She knew he was lying, that he had to be there because of Potter, but he was also a very convincing actor. It wasn't hard to see why so many girls became enamored with him. With a guilty twinge, she also remembered the look on James's face when he had seen her outside Zonko's.

"Look, Sirius," she said quietly, "I really don't want to discuss this, so please just let it alone, ok?" This time he did look slightly taken aback; he had clearly been expecting her to yell a bit.

"Yeah, alright," he mumbled as the Hogwarts gates came into view. "D'you want a cockroach cluster?"

••••••••••••

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	4. Snape's Worst Memory

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**Chapter Four: Snape's Worst Memory**

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"I told you, there's really nothing going on between us. I hardly even know him," Lily said patiently. Abigail stopped jumping up and down and let go of Lily's hands, but she didn't look entirely convinced.

Maybe because hardly knowing him had never been a problem before. Lily had "gone out" with a handful of boys over the past few years, but these relationships never amounted to much more than holding hands in the hallways.

The longest was with Davey Tucker, a Hufflepuff boy in her year, and it had lasted a month. Lily had spent far more time giggling about him with her friends than she had talking to him. In fact, she wasn't sure if they ever even had a proper conversation. They had mostly talked to each other in public with their respective friends lurking nearby, trying to look inconspicuous and failing spectacularly.

Lily had "broken up" with Davey almost a year ago; she had grown tired of playing boyfriend and girlfriend so their classmates would have something to gossip about. She strongly suspected that Abigail had been more disappointed over it than Davey.

Roger was something entirely different, that much was clear. But _what_ exactly, she had no idea.

That night, after the other girls had gone to sleep, Lily dug out her long-neglected diary from the bottom of her trunk. She climbed into bed, closed her curtains, and proceeded to jot down, in resolutely neutral terms, the details of her visit to the Three Broomsticks.

When she had finished, she stared down at what she'd written, rubbing her chin nervously with the end of her quill feather. She knew the diary only came out when she had confusing feelings to sort through. But it was hard; putting feelings down in ink made them alarmingly real.

_Why does everyone keep asking if I fancy him? Do I fancy him? I don't know very much about him. Ok, so he's nice… he's funny… and I have to admit dark brown hair goes really well with blue eyes…_

_But it doesn't matter anyway, I don't think he likes me very much. Maybe as a friend… and I might be ok with that… I just want to know, really. He's so hard to read! I wish there was a way to find out without making a complete fool of myself._

That would do for now. She set down her quill and closed the book, yawning. Halfway back to her trunk she froze, suddenly struck by an unpleasant thought.

Petunia. Her friends could be trusted not to go through her stuff, but Petunia couldn't. She was extremely nosey and they shared a room at home. If this diary wound up in her sister's hands, Lily knew she'd have to endure mean-spirited taunts about Roger for the whole summer.

She yawned again and stowed the diary in her trunk, resolving to look up a good protective hex next time she was in the library.

------

The rains finally went away the weekend before O.W.L.s were to start. Melinda and Lily decided to take advantage of the good weather and headed outside after lunch on Saturday to review for Defense Against the Dark Arts. Serena and Abigail stayed in the Great Hall to practice Divination, mostly trying to foresee each other's exam results.

They flopped down under the beech tree near the edge of the lake. Lily tried to concentrate on her book, absentmindedly tearing little clumps of grass from the ground next to her. But the blazing afternoon sun and a full stomach were too powerful, and she soon rested her head on the open textbook and drifted off to sleep. Next thing she knew, she was swing dancing with the giant squid.

"Wake up, sleepyhead." Someone poked her gently in the arm. Lily opened her eyes and saw her friend Mena Singh from Ravenclaw grinning at her.

"How long have I been out?" she mumbled, closing her eyes again. The sunlight filtering through her eyelids made it bright orangey-red instead of black.

"Only half an hour," Melinda replied. She turned back to Mena and resumed some conversation they must have been having about the differences between werewolves and Animagi. Lily pulled herself into a sitting position, making a half-hearted attempt to listen while she surveyed the rest of the students scattered about the grounds. A good many of them had dozed off as well.

Then sudden movement farther up the bank caught her eye. She squinted at it, trying to make out why there was a growing commotion. Mena and Melinda heard it too and had just turned to watch when James Potter came tearing across the lawn. He had what looked like a copy of _The Standard Book of Spells, Grade 5_ in his hand and Remus Lupin hot on his heels.

Remus was fast but James was faster, weaving through the crowd and leaping over supine students with the same grace and agility he always displayed on the Quidditch pitch. He had reached the water's edge and levitated the book several feet beyond it by the time Remus caught up. They were close enough for Lily to see the look of pure mischief alight on James's face. Remus was brandishing his wand and trying to look threatening. All the students on the lawn were watching them, and many had stood up to get a better view.

Melinda abruptly leaned over and whispered something in Mena's ear. Lily pulled her eyes off the spectacle in time to catch both of them giving her a funny look.

"What?" Lily asked, feeling highly disconcerted. But they had both turned back to watch the book inching towards the lake's surface as Remus edged towards James.

"All right, Potter?" Melinda called loudly, doing an uncanny impression of Lily's voice.

"_Accio book!_" Mena sang out at precisely the same moment, reaching up and catching Remus's copy of _The Standard Book of Spells, Grade 5_.

James's head whipped around so fast--hand flying to his hair--that he lost his balance, stumbled over a nearby rock, and went crashing to the ground. Lily didn't see this because she was busy shooting Melinda a death glare, but she did hear the roar of laughter from the crowd. She turned back to see the look of pure mischief transferred to Remus's face as he advanced on his friend.

"_Rictusempra!_" he said with great relish.

Sirius and Peter were pushing their way through the crowd. James, still on the ground, was now curled up and laughing so hard he could barely move. Sirius took one look at James and doubled up laughing almost as hard as if someone had hit him with a Tickling Charm too. Peter's face was wavering between laughter and shock; this was the first time Remus had ever jinxed someone in front of a large audience. The fact that James was on the receiving end for once made it all the more unusual.

After about thirty seconds Remus lifted the charm.

"Say sorry," he demanded cheerfully. Trying to catch his breath, James stood up, shook his head, and found himself dangling by the ankle with his hair brushing the water.

"Say sorry!" Remus sang gleefully.

"I'm not sorry, Moony, but you will be if--" _SPLASH!_

Lily didn't even try to keep the enormous grin off her face as Remus strode over to collect his book.

"Have I ever told you girls how much I adore you?" he asked happily as Mena handed it back. "I mean it, I owe you one… if there's anything I can do for you, don't hesitate to ask."

"Actually…" said Melinda, waving her notes and trying not to look too pleased with herself. "Have you already studied for Defense?"

"Yeah, a bit," Remus answered. "Why? Need help on something?"

"Do you remember all the differences between werewolves and Animagi? I thought I wrote them down but my handwriting's rubbish…"

Remus blinked, then looked over his shoulder to where Peter was helping a sopping and disgruntled James out of the lake. James gave him a look that said quite plainly that this was not over. Remus responded with a carefree wave; and Lily, hoping to add a dash of insult to injury, gazed up at Remus with the best look of feminine adoration she could muster. A curious expression crossed James's face. Then he shook the water from his hair and stalked off to the castle to change. Remus turned back to the girls.

"I can't say I'm an expert," he replied casually. "But yes, I think I can tell you most of the important points."

------

As it turned out, there was a werewolf question on the written part of their Defense exam. Lily was glad she had paid attention to Remus's explanation. He was remarkably well-versed on the subject, something he attributed to having read _Collected Essays and Studies on Lycanthropy_ over the winter holiday. It wasn't hard to see why he was the best in their year at Defense Against the Dark Arts.

As she read over her responses to the theory half of the exam, Lily was confidant she had gotten most of them right. She had been a bit more worried about Defense than Charms or Potions, but it had turned out to be not much worse. She finished scanning and sat back in her chair, fanning herself with the questions sheet.

"Quills down, please!" squeaked Professor Flitwick. Lily rolled up her responses and exchanged a look of relief with Serena, who was sitting across the aisle. It was really stuffy in the Great Hall and they couldn't wait to get outside. "That means you too, Stebbins! Please remain seated while I collect your parchment! _Accio!_"

More than a hundred rolls of parchment zoomed into the air and into Professor Flitwick's outstretched arms, knocking him backward off his feet. Several people laughed. A couple of students at the front desks got up, took hold of Professor Flitwick beneath the elbows, and lifted him onto his feet again.

"Thank you… thank you," panted Professor Flitwick. "Very well, everybody, you're free to go!"

Lily grabbed her things and went to meet up with her friends. They were joined by Mena and one of her Ravenclaw friends, Susan Pringle, whom Lily had hung out with a few times but didn't know as well.

"Come on!" said Melinda impatiently. "It's sweltering in here, let's get out." They hurried toward the entrance hall, hoping to beat the crowd.

"You'd think Flitwick could do a Cooling Charm for us or something," Abigail complained.

"Thank Merlin that's over," said Serena. "I'm surprised my hand hasn't fallen off yet."

"For the entire Great Hall?" said Susan, addressing Abigail. "Is that even possible?"

"There's still time," Lily told Serena. "It'll probably fall off during Transfiguration tomorrow."

"Where to?" Mena asked pointlessly, as Melinda was already leading them straight down to the lake's edge. She pulled off her shoes and socks, dipping her feet in the cool water, and the rest of them followed suit.

Lily wiggled her toes around, feeling instantly refreshed and much more relaxed. Mena and Susan were kicking sideways and splashing each other, while Melinda looked reminiscently toward the beech tree they'd been sitting under a few days before.

"What?" Abigail asked, following her gaze.

Lily did the same and saw Potter sitting under it, showing off with his Snitch for Pettigrew's amusement. He glanced over in her direction and rumpled up his already untidy hair. At least she _hoped_ it was for Pettigrew's amusement.

"It's too bad you missed the Potter in the Water show," Melinda responded, shaking her head slowly. "It was just brilliant."

"Potter in the Water?" Susan asked, sounding confused.

"You didn't tell her!" Melinda shot Mena an accusatory look.

"I told everyone at dinner," Mena said indignantly. She directed her own accusatory look at Susan. "_Somebody_ wasn't paying attention."

"Well are you going to tell me or not?"

Mena told her, and even though everyone else was familiar with the story, they were all giggling madly by the time she finished.

Except for Serena, whose attention was suddenly directed behind them. "Uh oh," she muttered.

Lily looked back. Severus Snape was on the ground, struggling against what looked like the Impediment Jinx. Black and Potter were advancing on him, wands up. A crowd was gathering around them and lots of people were laughing. She looked around quickly for Lupin and found him sitting under the beech tree, staring at a book.

Heart sinking, Lily pulled her feet out of the water, dried them off with her wand, and put on her socks and shoes. She kept one eye on Lupin the whole time, hoping against hope that he would decide to step in. _Come on, you spineless git!_ she thought angrily, getting to her feet.

Her friends let out a collective gasp, and Lily's eyes snapped back to Snape. Pink soap bubbles were streaming from his mouth. She couldn't believe her eyes.

_Those evil, twisted little monsters!_ she thought, storming towards them with her fists balled up in fury. The froth was covering his lips, making him gag, choking him--_HOW COULD THEY?_

"Leave him ALONE!"

Black and Potter turned to look at her. Potter's free hand jumped to his hair, like it did every time he noticed her.

"All right, Evans?" he said pleasantly, as though she had just joined them for tea.

"Leave him alone," Lily repeated, looking at him in disgust. "What's he done to you?"

"Well," said Potter, appearing to deliberate the point, "it's more the fact that he _exists_, if you know what I mean…."

Many of the surrounding watchers found this funny. Lily was suddenly aware of all the eager eyes trained on them, but rather than unnerving her it just fueled her anger. Potter was clearly enjoying the attention.

"You think you're funny," she said coldly. "But you're just an arrogant, bullying toerag, Potter. Leave him _alone._"

"I will if you go out with me, Evans," said Potter quickly. "Go on… Go out with me, and I'll never lay a wand on old Snivelly again." _He doesn't have a clue, does he?_

"I wouldn't go out with you if it was a choice between you and the giant squid," said Lily.

"Bad luck, Prongs," said Black briskly, turning back. "OY!"

There was a flash of light and a gash appeared on the side of James's face, spattering his robes with blood. Lily's breath caught in her chest. James whirled about; a second flash of light later, Snape was hanging upside down in the air, his robes falling over his head to reveal skinny, pallid legs and a pair of graying underpants.

Many people in the small crowd cheered. Sirius and James roared with laughter.

Lily had forgotten about Snape. He looked utterly ridiculous dangling there and she had to fight to suppress a smile. Luckily no one noticed; they were all too busy looking at Snape.

"Let him down!" she said, recovering her indignation.

"Certainly," said Potter and he jerked his wand upward. Snape fell into a crumpled heap on the ground. Disentangling himself from his robes, he got quickly to his feet, wand up, but Black said, "_Locomotor mortis!_" and Snape keeled over again at once, rigid as a board.

"LEAVE HIM ALONE!" Lily shouted, whipping out her wand. Black and Potter eyed it warily.

"Ah, Evans, don't make me hex you," said Potter earnestly.

"Take the curse off him, then!"

James sighed deeply, then turned to Snape and muttered the countercurse. Lily couldn't help enjoying the power she had over him, just a little. A few months ago, both James and Sirius would have hexed her in a heartbeat.

"There you go," he said, as Snape struggled to his feet again, "you're lucky Evans was here, Snivellus--"

"I don't need help from filthy little Mudbloods like her!"

Lily blinked, feeling like she had been slapped. She was the only person willing to stick her neck out for Snivelly, and this was the thanks she got? "Fine," she said coolly. "I won't bother in future. And I'd wash your pants if I were you, _Snivellus._"

"Apologize to Evans!" James roared at Snape, his wand pointed threateningly at him. Lily felt a little thrill of satisfaction before she remembered why she was there in the first place.

"I don't want you to make him apologize," she shouted, rounding on Potter. "You're as bad as he is…."

"What?" he yelped. "I'd NEVER call you a--you-know-what!"

Lily barely heard him. She was on a roll. "Messing up your hair because you think it looks cool to look like you've just got off your broomstick, showing off with that stupid Snitch, walking down corridors and hexing anyone who annoys you just because you can--I'm surprised your broomstick can get off the ground with that fat head on it. You make me SICK."

She turned on her heel and hurried away.

"Evans!" Potter shouted after her, "Hey, EVANS!"

But she didn't look back. Her heart was racing and she had to put as much distance between herself and James Potter as possible.

She didn't see Professor McGonagall in front of the castle until she almost ran into her. McGonagall had been frowning and looking at the crowd of students with narrowed eyes, as though trying to guess what they were up to, when she caught sight of Lily storming towards her. They crossed paths, going in opposite directions but wearing identical expressions.

••••••••••••

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	5. Fallout

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**Chapter Five: Fallout**

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Lily stomped up the stairs and spat out the password a bit more viciously than she had meant to. The Fat Lady put her hand to her chest and looked terribly offended before swinging open to let her through.

She had a nagging feeling that the whole disgraceful scene she'd just participated in had been put on for her benefit. Potter's face swam into her head, saying "_I'm a bad, bad boy, Evans, but you can make me good._" She pulled out her wand, conjured an empty can on the rug, and gave it a good hard kick. It hit the wall with a loud and satisfying clatter, making a group of second year girls by the fire jump. Lily apologized hastily, vanished the can, and hurried up to her room.

She flopped onto her bed and took several deep breaths to calm herself. How could Potter think that being desperate and nasty was attractive? And why her? There were plenty of girls who'd've been thrilled to go out with him, big popular Quidditch star that he was. Why couldn't he just pick one of them and leave her in peace?

She gazed at the ceiling for a few minutes, thoughts slowly drifting to Roger. She saw herself confiding in him about what had just happened, and him nodding sympathetically and saying "_You deserve someone much better--me, for example._"

The sound of the dormitory door opening jolted her out of her reverie. She watched Melinda, Abigail, and Serena file in quietly. They were all wearing expressions of mingled awe, disbelief, and perhaps a little fear.

"What?" Lily asked.

Melinda sunk onto her own bed, shaking her head. "They're really in for it now."

"Would someone like to tell me what's happened?" Lily asked when she didn't elaborate on this.

"Just after you left… well, Potter was really upset, and he--and he hung Snape upside down again." Serena sat down on the floor by Lily's bed, back to the wall and chin resting on her knees. "He asked… who wanted to see him--take off Snivelly's pants. Black took a poll, and apparently a lot of people did…." She trailed off, looking completely repulsed.

"So we'd got up to go," Melinda continued, "as none of us was all too chuffed at the idea. I guess he'd started to, I wasn't looking, but then… well, Professor McGonagall showed up."

Lily's jaw dropped. She remembered passing Professor McGonagall on her way in, but it hadn't really registered at the time.

"She was white as a ghost," Abigail whispered. "Shaking all over, she was so upset…."

"What did she say?" breathed Lily.

"Nothing. She just pointed at the castle and Black and Potter went. Even they didn't say anything. They looked terrified actually… I think this time they knew they were in it too deep…."

Lily slowly processed this information. So they had been trying to remove Snivelly's pants…. It certainly wasn't the first time they'd done something so appalling, but they'd never been caught before, not for anything this bad.

"D'you think they'll be expelled?" she wondered aloud. Nobody answered, but it looked like they were all thinking the same thing.

------

For the next two days, the boys' fates were the subject of much speculation around the school. Black and Potter did not turn up on Friday morning to sit the Transfiguration theory exam with the rest of their class. When they hadn't been spotted by dinner the following night, it seemed a foregone conclusion to many that they'd finally done it, finally reached the point of no return.

Pettigrew and Lupin, when they weren't sitting the exams themselves, stayed holed up in their dormitory. It was impossible to say what they knew because they weren't speaking about it to anyone.

Lily herself was subject to a good deal of staring and whispering wherever she went, but she refused to let it bother her. People she barely knew were coming up to her and asking for news of Potter and Black; not wanting to attract more negative attention, she just told them politely but firmly she didn't have any.

On Saturday she saw Sirius in the library talking to a handful of excited Slytherins--including Severus Snape--and knew that she was finally cracking up from stress of exams. On closer inspection, however, this turned out to be Regulus Black--who, except for being a few inches shorter, was the spitting image of his older brother.

She lingered at a nearby bookrack, straining to catch their conversation.

"Yeah, Dumbledore already wrote Mum and Dad, and they're furious," said Regulus happily. "They think the old man's really going to chuck him out this time." Lily's stomach dropped to her feet. Snape looked like his wildest dreams were finally coming true--which, come to think of it, they probably were.

------

"Have they been chucked out?" Lily asked without preamble as she and Remus made their way down the stairs leading to the dungeons.

Saturday night was their second scheduled patrol duty, and this time Remus had decided to come, though he once again looked a bit ill.

"No, they haven't," he said.

Lily felt immensely relieved, though she tried not to show it. James and Sirius annoyed her to no end, they always had, but she simply could not imagine Hogwarts without them.

"Then where've they gone?" she asked evenly.

"They haven't gone anywhere. They've just been returning to the dormitory really late at night. McGonagall's been watching them while Dumbledore decided what to do."

"But what about exams?"

"They sat them in her office."

"So then, what did Dumbledore decide to do?"

Remus looked sideways at her. "I don't know if they'd want me to say…" he answered slowly.

"Oh come off it," said Lily. "You know those two don't get embarrassed by punishments."

Lupin shrugged apologetically. "If they want people to know, they'll tell it themselves."

They continued along the damp dungeon corridors in silence. Lily was busy trying to work out what sort of punishment Dumbledore would have thought appropriate, short of expulsion. Potter and Black had, after all, been caught in the act of removing another student's pants for a circle of onlookers.

Having covered the lower levels and seen no signs of suspicious activity, Remus and Lily began to climb back up to the ground floor. The thought of suspicious activity reminded Lily of what she had meant to ask Lupin ages ago. She had just opened her mouth to do so when his arm flew out, holding her back. Lily had a distinct feeling of déjà vu.

"What?"

He just shook his head and pulled her back into the shadows at the top of the steps. Lily peered around him curiously and saw three people crossing the entrance hall, heading toward the great oak front doors.

She recognized Mr. and Mrs. Potter from King's Cross Station. Mr. Potter had the same unruly black hair as his son, though he at least made some effort to keep it in order. He and his wife had always looked so pleasant and cheerful before, always fussing tenderly over James and his friends. But now Mr. Potter's face was stony and Mrs. Potter had clearly been crying.

James was trailing several feet behind them, staring miserably at the floor. There was a large scar on his cheek where Snape's spell had cut him.

"Why are his--but you said they weren't--" Lily stammered, as all three Potters disappeared through the front doors, but Remus held up a hand to quiet her. "Not yet."

She waited, utterly perplexed, until James came back in alone. This only added to her confusion but Remus seemed to have been expecting it. He took off across the entrance hall towards James, and Lily followed tentatively, not sure what else to do.

"Prongs?" James was leaning back against the wall; instead of answering, he let out a sort of hollow groan and slid down it, burying his face in his hands. Remus sat down on the floor across from him.

"They saw it," James said miserably. "They saw the whole thing."

"I know, Padfoot told me," Remus said quietly.

"They weren't even angry," he wailed. "Just so--sad, and--and disappointed… like they couldn't believe I was really their son…."

Remus sighed heavily.

Lily was standing awkwardly to one side. Her anger at James was now battling both curiosity and her natural instinct to comfort people when they were down.

"What did they see?" she asked gently, kneeling next to Remus.

James looked up at her, eyes widening in shock. He obviously hadn't realized she was there. His hand twitched (but did not fly to his hair), and he suddenly seemed incapable of speech.

"Dumbledore has this--this memory thing…" Remus began.

"It's a big stone bowl," said James, finding his voice, "and you can take memories out of a person's head… put them inside, and then you sort of fall in…"

"And see the whole thing just like you were there," said Remus.

"Well you can guess what memory he got from… _Snivellus,_" James snarled.

Lily frowned, but James became very interested in his shoelaces and didn't look at her.

"Right," said Remus, also frowning. "Right, well Dumbledore thought it would be a good idea for James and Sirius to watch this memory with their parents."

"How awful!" Lily exclaimed. The whole ugly scene flashed through her mind… those pink soap bubbles choking Snape, those graying underpants… she didn't dare think of how far they might have come off before Professor McGonagall had intervened…. She could only begin to imagine how mortifying it must have been for the Potters to stand there and watch their son do it all. "Oh your poor parents!"

James, who had looked up hopefully at her first words, now seemed slightly disappointed that the sympathy wasn't directed at him. "Yeah," he said dully, "I suspect it wasn't their proudest moment."

"How did Sirius's parents take it?" she asked Remus.

"Well, the Blacks are every bit as nasty as the Potters are nice," said Remus matter-of-factly. "And since they already think Sirius is a disgrace to the family name, they were a bit less disappointed and a bit more angry. Actually, his mum said she'd rather have had Snape for a son."

Lily wasn't sure she'd heard right. She knew Sirius didn't get on so well with his parents, but even so, this seemed like an odd thing for Mrs. Black to say. "Does she know Snape then?"

"Not personally," Remus replied. "But Sirius's cousin Narcissa and her fiancé think highly of him, and Sirius's mum thinks highly of cousin Narcissa and her fiancé."

Lily wrinkled her nose. She remembered cousin Narcissa rather well and did not quite share Mrs. Black's opinion of her.

Her very first night at Hogwarts, as the prefects were leading them from the feast to their dormitories, those two harpies had swooped down on Sirius, spitting poison at him for getting sorted to Gryffindor instead of Slytherin. The older students all had been too terrified of cousin Bellatrix to do anything; but a scrawny, bespectacled, eleven-year-old James Potter had marched right up and kicked her hard in the shins. True, he landed them both in the hospital wing before classes even started, but he and Sirius had been inseparable ever since.

James now seemed on the verge of saying a few colorful words about Mrs. Black, but glanced at Lily and bit back his tongue. Lily was feeling somewhat kindlier towards him, in spite of the very nasty look on his face.

"It's alright, he really doesn't care," said Remus, mistaking Lily's expression as pity for Sirius. "He was far more sick over what James's parents would think of him when they saw it."

James sighed. "Can't be much worse than they think of me, can it?"

"Well at least you two didn't get expelled," Lily said bracingly as she stood up. Remus stood too and extended a hand to help James.

"So how much longer are you stuck with McGonagall?" he asked as the three of them climbed the staircase to the first floor.

"We've got detentions for the rest of term," James said indifferently. "She's still hopping mad too--" there was now a hint of boastfulness in his voice "--said if it was up to her, she would've chucked us, and we're lucky the Headmaster's more forgiving…"

"Mr. Potter!"

The three of them jumped and turned to see Professor McGonagall herself striding towards them. James blanched.

"You do not have permission to be roaming the corridors," she said, her eyes flashing dangerously. "You were told to go straight to your dormitory, were you not?"

"S--sorry, Professor…"

"Don't sorry me, Potter," she said quietly. "Fifty points from Gryffindor."

Lily gasped. It had not quite hit her until now how angry Professor McGonagall really was. The way she spoke softly to James was much more frightening than if she'd been yelling at the top of her voice.

He must have agreed, because he slunk back without another word, turned, and hurried up the stairs as fast as he could.

"And you two," she said, returning to her usual brisk and snappish manner, "are supposed to be patrolling the halls, not standing about hobnobbing. Five points each from Gryffindor." Lily and Remus exchanged wide-eyed looks as she turned and disappeared back into her office.

They covered the rest of the first floor in silence, not caring to do anything that might be interpreted as hobnobbing so close to Professor McGonagall's office. As they reached the second floor, Lily found herself sincerely hoping there would be no run-ins with snogging Slytherins tonight. Then once again, the memory of her earlier patrol duty reminded her of something.

"Remus?"

"Yes?"

"Remember back at the prefects' meeting, when you mentioned Voldemort trying to recruit someone at Hogwarts? What was that all about? It's been driving me crazy for ages."

"How do you mean?" he asked with the air of a man who was stalling for time.

"What did you overhear exactly? Oh, I don't care _why_ you overheard it, you idiot. But it's not fair to say something like that and not provide all the details."

"You're not going to give me a moment's peace until I spill this, are you?" Lily grinned and shook her head. "Oh, alright then. A couple days before the meeting…"

------

_(A couple days before the meeting…)_

"Are you sure there's none on the lower shelf?"

"I told you, I already looked," said James irritably. "And for the last time, yes, I'm sure there's no Ogden's here."

"Will you two stop bickering and just pick something!" Remus implored. He glanced nervously at Peter, who was standing guard with one ear pressed to the staff room door.

"Now do you want the currant rum or--"

"Oh, move over and let me have a look!" James threw up his hands and stepped back from the liquor cabinet. Sirius bent down to scan the lower shelves. "Elderflower wine?" he groaned. "Why are these idiots wasting space on rubbish like--"

"Guys!" Peter hissed urgently. "I think someone's coming!"

James sprinted to the door and put his own ear to it. "He's right, hide!"

Remus flung open the door of the old wardrobe. The others dashed over, James grabbing his Invisibility Cloak off the back of a nearby chair on his way. Somehow they all managed to cram themselves in, and they had just closed the wardrobe door when the staff room door was pulled open.

The four boys held their breaths. Through the thin slit where the wardrobe door met the side panel, Remus could see Professors McGonagall, Flitwick, and Dumbledore entering the room.

"But how would he get someone into the castle to do it?" Professor McGonagall was asking.

"He wouldn't need to get someone into the castle, my dear Minerva, if he could get someone who's already inside to do it," Dumbledore replied as he lifted a cushion off one of the armchairs, apparently looking for something.

"What color was it?" squeaked Professor Flitwick, who was peering under one of the low tables.

"Purple," said Dumbledore as he moved on to the next armchair and repeated the process.

"And you're still not sure which one he's after?" McGonagall asked, sounding slightly annoyed at the distraction.

"I have a strong suspicion as to why," said Dumbledore with a sigh, "and many guesses as to which. But no, I am not sure."

"Then what are we to do?" asked Flitwick. He was moving closer and closer to the wardrobe as he slowly scanned the floor.

Someone's elbow was jammed against the side of Remus's head and a moth-eaten robe was tickling his nose, but he didn't dare move.

"We shall of course take steps to protect all possible targets, in the manner that I have already explained to you both."

"But will that be enough?" McGonagall asked skeptically.

"We must also keep our eyes and ears open for any unusual activity around the castle," said Dumbledore, who was now rummaging through the drawers of the writing desk. "Even among the students, I'm afraid."

"Surely you don't think he would entrust this to a student?" Professor McGonagall exclaimed.

Finding nothing of interest under the tables, Professor Flitwick looked up and caught sight of the wardrobe.

"At this stage, he may only be watching, and for that a student would suffice," Dumbledore answered. Flitwick walked purposefully towards the wardrobe.

"But he may not yet know that I am aware of his intentions, and am taking the necessary precautions," Dumbledore continued. Flitwick reached for the handle on the wardrobe door. "Found it, Filius!" Dumbledore straightened up, triumphantly holding a purple sock. Flitwick let go of the door handle and turned back to his colleagues.

"We must take care not to do anything that would alert him," said Dumbledore as he held open the staff room door for McGonagall and Flitwick. "Though to some extent it may be unavoidable." He followed them through it and the door clicked shut behind him.

The boys waited a full two minutes after the teachers had departed before cautiously opening the wardrobe door. Satisfied that the coast was clear, they tumbled out and disentangled themselves.

"Close one," James grinned as he unfurled the Invisibility Cloak.

"Too close," Remus grumbled. They all hurried to the door.

"Wait!" Sirius ran back to the liquor cabinet and pulled out two bottles of elf-made wine before rejoining his friends.

They covered themselves as best they could with James's cloak and, trying not to jostle each other too much, made their way out of the staff room and back to Gryffindor Tower.

------

"…then they left, so we didn't get to hear anything more," Remus finished up.

Lily groaned inwardly; rather than answering any questions, Remus's story had only planted several hundred more in her mind.

••••••••••••

_Please Note--Remus has very kindly consented to share the whole staff room incident with you from his point of view. However he warns that when he told Lily, he might have omitted certain details, like what the Marauders were doing in the staff room in the first place. He thinks he also forgot to mention the Invisibility Cloak. Oops._

Your feedback means so much to me!


	6. Roger's Story

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**Chapter Six: Roger's Story**

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"Should I do it?" asked Abigail, sneaking another nervous glance over her shoulder in Eddie Wentwhistle's direction.

Melinda groaned. "You ask one more time and I swear I'm just going to go ask him for you myself." Abigail looked at her in alarm.

"Just do it," Serena said kindly as she heaped more mashed potatoes onto her plate. "I don't know what you're so worried about, everyone knows he likes you."

"No they don't," moaned Abigail. "What if he still likes Egglesby? They've only been broken up a few weeks."

"Yes, but _he_ broke up with _her_," Lily pointed out patiently.

She was only half paying attention to the conversation, as she had been stealing her own, rather more surreptitious glances in Roger Gray's direction all through dinner.

Lately she had found herself involuntarily scanning the Ravenclaw table each time she entered the Great Hall, just hoping to see him there. He looked so... _happy_ all the time, surrounded by a group of laughing, joking friends, all of whom were older Ravenclaws she didn't know. (She'd almost asked Mena about them once or twice, but she couldn't think how to bring it up without having to explain _why_ she was so interested all of a sudden.) While she longed to be sitting there and laughing with him, just seeing him was enough to brighten her day.

Today, however, during the brief moment she'd allowed her eyes to linger on his face, Lily had seen an unusually gloomy and subdued Roger, and it was bothering her. Though there were too many students between them to afford a clear view, her eyes kept traveling back to the spot where she could occasionally see the back of his head. At least, she was pretty sure it was _his_ head.

Across the table from her, Lupin was trying to look politely interested in the matter of Abigail's date for Slughorn's end-of-term party. Next to him, Pettigrew was tracing designs in his own mashed potatoes with a fork. The two of them had taken to eating meals with the girls while Potter and Black, having not yet fully atoned for their sins, remained in seclusion.

Lupin fit quite naturally in their midst. He alone among his friends could have a conversation with girls that didn't inevitably devolve into bragging or teasing. Pettigrew, however, took more getting used to. He alone among his friends seemed to lose all powers of speech when confronted with members of the gentler sex.

Abigail continued to twist a lock of hair around her finger and fret about Wentwhistle. "What if he's wishing now he hadn't broke up with her? I mean, she's really good looking, isn't she?"

"Well you're better looking," said Lily reflexively, directing her attention back to her own table. Abigail looked unconvinced.

Lily opened her mouth to say something else, but changed her mind and instead gave Lupin a light kick under the table; he looked momentarily confused, then caught her drift. "She's right, you're loads prettier," he said encouragingly. "And Egglesby is far too annoying, no one in the their right mind would miss her."

Abigail beamed at him. "You really think so?"

"Of course," he nodded solemnly. "Wentwhistle'd be a fool to say no."

"Alright then, here I go." She took a deep breath and rose from her seat, casting an appreciative smile at Lupin.

Pettigrew gazed at his friend with indiscreet awe, like he never knew Lupin had it in him to work such magic on girls. Lupin looked faintly embarrassed by this but mostly pretended not to notice.

Lily looked past them and was pleased to note that the back of Roger's head had not left the Ravenclaw table.

Apart from exchanging a couple of polite smiles in the corridors, they hadn't actually run into each other since that day in Hogsmeade three weeks ago. She had been getting more and more agitated about this, to the point where she was embarrassed to admit, even to herself, how much time she spent thinking about it.

But summer was staring them all in the face and she was seized by a stupid desperation to talk to him again before parting ways. He would be back next year, of course, but she didn't want to go two whole months without him. They could send each other owls, maybe even meet.

No, meeting was too much to hope for at this point. Owls were enough.

First, though, she had to talk to him. But when? Where? How? Abigail had reminded her that they could bring a guest to Slughorn's party (she had almost forgotten about Slughorn's party) but Lily was not about to march up and invite Roger in the middle of dinner. She couldn't stand the thought of being rejected and having so many people know about it.

Abigail bounced back a few minutes later looking ecstatic. "He said yes!" she squealed. Lily joined in the chorus of that's-great's and I-told-you-so's, but her mind was still on the Roger Problem.

"I think you're very pretty too," Pettigrew piped up. _That_ jolted Lily out of her thoughts; her head snapped to him, as did everyone else's. He hadn't uttered a word before that all evening.

Pettigrew, quickly realizing his statement hadn't gone over as well as Lupin's, turned pink. "I mean... I knew he would say yes too..." he mumbled to his plate.

Lily felt a small pang of pity for the boy. While Potter and Black were forever having laughs at his expense, their absence seemed to have left him at a bit of a loss. She could sense him trying to deify Lupin in their stead, but Lupin's mild-mannered confidence was much harder to mimic than Black and Potter's bullying bravado.

As they were leaving the Great Hall a few minutes later, Lily automatically looked back to check on the Ravenclaw table. Roger and his friends were also getting up to leave.

Lupin paused in the middle of the entrance hall and said he had some books to return to the library. Pettigrew looked relieved for an excuse to leave the girls. As the two of them waved goodbye, Roger's group emerged from the Great Hall, and Roger, still looking gloomy, waved his own goodbye and headed out the front doors alone.

_Alone._

Lily's brain kicked into overdrive as she started up the stairs with her friends. She ground to a halt halfway up. "I just remembered, I've been meaning to look up some things in the library," she said, hoping she sounded calmer than she felt. "I think I'll join them."

The others gave her a puzzled look. "Exams are over," said Melinda. "What could you possibly need to look up?"

"Oh, just some good spells to keep my sister away from my things," Lily explained. Luckily they bought it. They had heard a great deal about Petunia over the years, and no doubt saw the wisdom in this move.

Lily turned and hurried back down the stairs with a surge of adrenaline. She had already looked up the spells and of course had no intention of going to the library.

She paused on reaching the front doors, wiped her sweaty hands on her robes, and, steeling herself with a deep breath, stepped out into the breezy summer dusk.

A good many students were out on the grounds taking advantage of the pleasant evening. Happy couples were strolling hand in hand, younger students were playing gobstones, and there was even a pick up game of Quidditch in progress.

As her eyes adjusted to the rapidly fading light, Lily began walking with no real idea where she was headed. The last sliver of sun was slipping behind the distant mountains and already the moon loomed large over the treetops of the Forbidden Forest.

She spotted Clementine Harper and Eustace Womple kissing under the beech tree; and, farther off in the distance, what looked like the silhouette of Roger Gray, moodily skipping stones over the surface of the lake. She started towards him, then slowed down, then stopped altogether, feeling like a large number of doxies had suddenly decided to throw a party in her stomach.

_Oh go on… you're not going to get another chance like this…._

"Roger?"

He hadn't heard her approaching and looked up in surprise, as though jolted from a nap in the middle of class.

"I--I was just out for a walk," Lily lied. "Saw you alone and thought you might like some company…."

Crickets chirped loudly all around them, while Roger simply continued to look at her. Unlike Potter's, his was a maddeningly inscrutable expression of surprise, and Lily couldn't tell if he was pleased to see her or not. Maybe he was annoyed at having his thoughts interrupted.

"It's alright if you don't," she said quickly, her face getting hot. "I can just go…."

"Huh?" said Roger, finally breaking through his reverie. "Oh no, you don't have to go. Uh, have a seat…." He nodded, indicating the ground next to him. "Sorry," he added as Lily settled herself on the grass. "You got me off guard. I was just… thinking…."

"What about?" she asked, feeling slightly relieved.

"Oh, you know…" he said vaguely, selecting another stone and sending it hopping across the wind-rippled water. Lily pulled off her shoes and socks, waiting for him to expand on this.

"Is anything the matter?" she finally asked. "You look a little… down."

Roger shrugged. "End of the year, going to miss people over the summer, got some older friends leaving… the usual…."

"Mm," said Lily sympathetically.

He resumed his pensive silence, and she slid her feet through the cool grass, scrunching it with her toes. The doxies in her stomach seemed to have decided they'd rather spend a quiet night at home after all.

"Hey," said Roger, turning to her suddenly, "you're Muggle-born, aren't you?"

"Yes…."

"What do your folks think of you being a witch?"

Lily shrugged. "They're happy for me. They think it's a really special gift. Why?"

"And they've always thought that?" he pressed. "Right since you got your letter?"

"I think so," said Lily, unsure where he was going with this. "I mean, back then we were all just happy to know the reason why--er--_unusual_ things seemed to happen when I got mad."

Roger grinned knowingly at her. "Ah, accidental magic…" he said with a reminiscent gleam in his eyes. "Those were the days, no? My teachers and classmates used to be terrified of me."

"My sister was of me. Not that I can blame her really… after all, heavy objects did have a habit of hitting the back of her head when we fought…"

Roger laughed. "What, she didn't do accidental magic too?"

"Oh no, she's never done any magic," Lily replied. "She's a Muggle."

"Wow." Roger stopped laughing and gave a low whistle. "That must make things a tad… awkward…."

Lily nodded darkly. "She hates that I'm a witch, really hates it. After I left for school, she told all our old friends I'd gone mental and had to be sent away."

Roger looked unsure whether to laugh or sympathize. "She was probably just jealous."

"That's what Mum and Dad said. I understand, it can't be easy being Muggle and having a witch for a sister, but still…." Lily sighed.

"No, I know what you mean," said Roger, picking up the pensive look he'd dropped earlier. "I think my mum's been getting a bit jealous of me too lately."

_Your mum?_ thought Lily, but out loud she said, "Lately? Why lately?"

"I don't know really. That's why I was asking about yours…"

Well at least his earlier questions made sense now. Sort of. "So she was fine with you doing magic at first?"

"Well…" said Roger slowly, "it's a bit complicated…."

He plucked a blade of grass and started chewing on it, with the air of one trying to make up his mind. "She's never exactly liked me," he said at last. "She had me when she was really young, you see, and… I think she resents me for ruining her life…."

Lily's eyebrows shot up in surprise. "What?" she yelped.

"Yeah," he said heavily. "First her parents kicked her out, then dad disappeared after I was born… so now I'm the only one around left to blame…."

"But--but…"

"I know, it doesn't make sense, but I was used to it," he said simply. "But then she started acting jealous too--round about last summer—and… what am I supposed to do about that?" He ran his hands through his hair, looking frustrated. "I think it's because I'm still in school… she was about my age when she had to drop out…."

This was a pretty big revelation for Lily to take in unprepared and she had no idea what to make of it. Well, she knew she didn't like the sound of Roger's mother one bit… but she also couldn't help feeling sorry for the woman….

"How did it--how did it happen?" she asked finally.

"By it you mean me?" he said, sounding slightly amused.

"Well… yes…"

Roger smirked at her. "You see Evans, when a man and a woman love each other--or think they do anyway--"

"Not _that_, you idiot!" Mercifully it was too dark out for him to see her blushing furiously. She had half a mind to hit him, but summoned up a withering look and gave it instead.

"Sorry," he said, but with a slight mocking smile still playing on his face. "You mean how'd she meet my father and all? Honestly, I don't know very much about it." He lay back in the grass, hands folded behind his head, so that Lily had to look over her shoulder to see his face.

"My Uncle Alfred--he was Mum's brother--said dad was supposed to be this rich kid, just out of school I think. He'd never actually met him though. Suspected he was just acting out against his family or something, being with Mum. Then one day he got bored and I guess went off to find a nice respectable wife… disappeared, left a note saying not to look for him… and, well, that was that…."

"He just _left?_" said Lily indignantly. She leaned back on her arms, feeling a much purer disdain for Roger's dad than she had for his mum.

"He just left," Roger repeated. "Anyway, that's all I know. Mum never talks about him, and I know better than to ask… bit of a touchy subject with her, for some reason." He sighed heavily. "I don't even know his name…."

"Isn't it Gray?" Lily asked stupidly.

"No," he said quietly, "he and Mum never married. And I guess she doesn't want me to know his name so I can't go after him… not that I would anyway…."

"Why not?"

"What's the use? Doesn't sound like he'd be a very nice person, does he? Or happy to see me…."

"No," she admitted; and, unable to think of anything to add to this, simply lay back and rested her head in the grass beside Roger's.

For the next few minutes, the two of them stared up at the stars in silence. Lily was flattered that Roger had chosen to share with her such personal details of his life, and impressed, too, by how maturely he could talk about them. A warm contentment stole over her, and she thought she wouldn't have minded passing the whole night like this, just lying side by side in the silvery moonlight.

"Well," she said eventually, "you seem to have turned out alright, despite the lousy hand at parents."

He rolled on his side, propping himself up on one elbow, and grinned at her. "Thanks…. Might not have though, if it hadn't been for the whole magic thing…."

"Oh?" said Lily, now oddly unable to meet his eyes. He wasn't leaning especially close, but all of a sudden she was very conscious of the heat emanating from his body. The doxies in her stomach were doing their thing again, and this time they'd invited all their little doxy cousins.

"Oh yeah, I was a little terror as a kid, even without the accidental magic. Lots of issues at home, as the teachers liked to call it."

"At least you grew out of it though, didn't you?"

"Yep," he said cheerfully. "Soon as I left home, I stopped having the issues."

Lily chanced a glance at his face; their eyes met for a moment and she looked away quickly. "It must be hard going back," she whispered.

"Well," he said a little less cheerfully, "can't say I'm looking forward to it…. But at least this is the last summer I'll have to, so I suppose it could be worse."

"And it's only for two months," she pointed out.

"Right," said Roger as he checked his watch. "It's getting a bit late, we should probably go in." He got to his feet. "I mean, two prefects, out past curfew… what would people say?"

"It would be scandalous," Lily said dramatically. She stood up too, brushing bits of grass off her robes.

"You know what would brighten your summer a bit?" she asked as they made their way across the now largely deserted grounds.

"What's that?"

"Writing me letters."

Roger grinned. "Not a bad idea, I suppose. I'll keep that in mind."

Filch, the caretaker, was in the process of closing the oak front doors and shot them a nasty look as they crossed into the entrance hall.

"Oh, I've just remembered," said Lily as they paused to part ways, "Professor Slughorn is having an end-of-term party and I promised to go. Would you like to come?"

Roger turned a disconcertingly shrewd look on her and seemed to search her face for a few moments before responding. "When is it?"

"Lunch on the last day, before the feast," she said, praying she wasn't blushing. _He knows… he knows I fancy him…._

"Mm, sorry, can't," he said, turning away again. "Ravenclaws are having a party for the seventh years…."

"That's alright," said Lily, a little too brightly.

"Have fun though…."

"You too!"

She walked back to Gryffindor Tower slowly after they'd said their goodnights, trying to understand what had just transpired. Things had been going just peachy until she'd asked him to the party… then he'd given her that--that _look_, and it was like suddenly he knew far more about her than he should….

••••••••••••

Leave feedback! Come on, where else are your opinions this highly valued?

_A/N--James and Sirius return next time. They've been forcibly kept out of trouble for two weeks now, and I think they're getting a bit restless._


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